This year I took a holiday and you were there in my heart
and mind. You were not present, nor did I try to keep in touch.
I wanted you to have your own time to reflect and to do
whatever you chose. I wanted to have the freedom to go since
I suspected that you were not ready to travel with me. Strange as
it may seem, these suspicions became the reality that I then faced.
With consequences when I came back home. Whilst travelling and
staying for some time near the beach, in my own apartment, to enjoy
my sea and reflection holiday, you were often present with your absence!
My love for you was present when I swam in that crowded beach full
of people. Somehow I just wanted to swim and take the sun as a reminder
of our summer months on those few times that we walked by the sea
or had a swim. I even promised myself to lose some weight and become
trimmer. This I had promised I would do, even though you doubted
and others doubted too that this was possible in Italy. On holidays people,
tourists generally put on weight , indulge in the local food and are relaxed
to enjoy what the locals are famous for in their cooking. Somehow, I don't
know why, I did not even write one poem about you or us! My friendship
or you, I thought, was solid and could not be broken. So secure in my belief
that I would look forward to meeting you again on my return and be like
we had been. Renewing the texting, chatting on the phone, having our
activities on those occasional times when we met. A more genuine love
and like you could not have for yourself. I know that we were not always
on the same page with our opinions, ways of doing things and I went
along with the fact that I seemed to be so clumsy and ignorant about
normal, everyday things, technology and decision making!
"What a surprise I did receive!" Totally unexpected in my travels still
with you in mind on my return!
